Name: Simon Northwood.
Age: 35.
Years supported: 35.
First game: Home V Arsenal 1980.
Favourite all time player: Mark Stein.
Favourite current player: Liam Lawrence.
Worst ever player: Keith Scott.
Fantasy signing: Wesley Schnieder.
Tell us a secret: Your mama don't wear no draws.
Who’s the daddy: Iggy Pop.
We'll finish: 16th.
If Stoke were a band: Black Flag; brutal, uncompromising and relentless.