The Football Blog

Q: FIFA select you to be part of a think tank on the future of women’s football and you’re asked to bring three innovative proposals to the first meeting. What do you suggest?

Jeff: "I think the shorts should be shorter and the shirts tighter. I can assure you this has nothing to do with making the girls look sexier and attracting more male fans. It's actually part of an experiment to see whether this type of kit is less likely to be grabbed and pulled as we see in the men's game. It may also help if their shirts were made of a material that would actually tear when held, thereby proving as to whether holding was actually taking place."

See You Are The Jeff every week in Catflap Magazine.