I have written about these ocular monstrosities before, but I feel the need to clarify my position on the matter. I will do so by saying just this: professional footballers should not be made to look like any of the following - police officers, stadium groundstaff, lollipop ladies (or gentlemen for the politically correct among you), fire wardens, or Wigan players.
I simply cannot see the logic behind making players wear kits such as these, or for that matter why they are becoming so popular with Premier League clubs. Oh how I laughed last season when Chelsea paraded their players around in these abysmal excuses for professional footballer apparel, only to have to eat my own words this season as our mighty club decided to follow suit. The only logical explanation I can come up with for them is for snow games where visibility is admittedly reduced, but we get maybe two or three of those a year between all the top flight clubs, and even then its not like the players instantly disappear under a veil of white and just start booting the ball into touch.
Maybe there's some weird secret affliction affecting our footballers, causing them to slowly lose their vision like Paul Scholes did that time a couple of seasons ago. In which case I'll let them off, as wearing a high-visibility (as I believe they are known in the trade) strip, is far preferable to the frankly rubbish excuse that Sir Alex wheeled out that time when United got beat 6-3 by Southampton a few years ago i.e. our players couldn't see each other because of our awful, awful kit. Or perhaps its some large-scale road safety initiative on behalf of the FA, maybe alot of our footballers are getting run over or knocked off their bikes on the way home from training. Because, y'know, alot of Premier League footballers are known for their love of bicycles.
Look at the sheer enthusiasm Timmy and Mikky display for their lovely new kit. They look like a pair of hostages forced to promote it at gunpoint:
"We are being treated well and are being fed and watered, but our captors insist that you buy our new 3rd strip or face the dire consequences."
Nevertheless, no matter how much I detest these kits they are
infinitely preferable to the current Liverpool away strip, y'know the
grey checkerboard one? Yeah, you know the one. That thing is truly
abhorrent...
