Hello there, my name is John and I shall be guiding
you through the murky waters of rumour and conjecture surrounding our beloved
club of late. Lets face it, it's been a pretty shocking start to the season by
anyone's standards (except maybe Derby) with our only points coming from the
three promoted teams and <shudder> Newcastle, and still no win at
Goodison. Not to mention an early exit from both the Carling and UEFA cups. And
as if all that wasn't bad enough, we've only gone out and got one of those
godawful luminous yellow 3rd strips, which confuse and confound me in equal
measure. I can only assume a disproportionate number of Blues fans are being
knocked off their bikes whilst cycling at night, necessetating this sweeping
social gesture.
Added to all this, we have Davey Moyes acting like
some French floozy, constantly wafting his eyelashes and whispering sweet
nothings to us regarding his new (£17 mil, 5 year) contract, then stealing away
in the dead of night before 'sealing the deal,' so to speak. Last I heard, this
was all supposed to have been resolved before the Newcastle game last weekend,
but still nothing's happened and trying to get a straight answer out of the
club of late is as futile as putting a cat in a microwave.
Anyway,
in the words of a better, more learned, man than myself "things can
only get better." With having two less cups to worry about we can at
least now focus our collective energy on sorting out our league form,
and figuring out how the hell you actually pronounce Marouane
Fellaini's name...